“Scores or grades from a subject will not define your intelligence because, what matters the most is how you’ll use the acquired knowledge in the end.”

February 09, 2017, Thursday, was my most realized day for that week because, that was the day that I had asked to see my grades in all subjects except Philosophy.  It was during our recess time in the afternoon, I and my best friend went to the faculty room to inquire our scores.  My scores were good. I had not thought that I would pass Physics and Basic Calculus but I did.  However, in my subject English for Academic Purposes the most unexpected dreadful thing happened to me.  My score was below 85. I could not comprehend what happened there.  I never knew that I would be that low.  I was hoping that I could get an approximate 85 just to pass and to be with the “with honors” group but I failed to do it.  I HAVE MADE MYSELF FAIL.  It hurt, but I told my instructor that I would get back to my feet again and recover the score that I had failed to achieve this mid-sem.

On my way home, I never knew that I would cry again for I had already cried in school.  I was thinking about me sitting on the bleachers and not on the chair and receiving an award for a job well done even if it was just a paper.  Although my heart ached and I was drowning in misery, doubt, disappointment and broken self-esteem, my best friend cheered and comforted me.  It was very sweet, because she should be happy that she passed the subjects but throughout the night she just kept me accompany with her comforting words and support.  She also told me that she was proud of me because I was the highest in our subject, Basic Calculus and she added that I should be happy about the result of it and the two of us will make it up for the finals.  I could not help myself to feel happy again because of all her messages that I had read.  I am so glad that I have met her during our tenth grade.

It was too painful to know that I had a low score in one subject and the most hurtful of all was because that subject was my favorite.  It just turned me into pieces.  It was as if I was in the situation again when my heart was broken into pieces because of discovering something. It broke my confidence and self-esteem.  I could not believe it.  It felt like I was in my nightmare that all I can do now is to cry.  Even though I know that crying will not help anything in my situation at all.  I could not help it.  The pain, the thoughts, it was too much to bear.  However, despite what I had felt, what I had endured there was someone who stood by and opened her arms for me to cry on.  I did not like crying.  I never like crying but during those moments it felt safe to cry, to let go all of the unnecessary thoughts in my head, to just cry the pain out of me until it runs dry.  She never left me and it was the feeling of being taken care of by another person.  The feeling when you are not alone in this world because you have someone with you.

As for my realization, the world does not revolve around the percentage of a person’s grades but it revolves with the intelligent people who can make it a better place.

  Sometimes, we have to fall down to know our strength and to climb back up again.  There is nothing wrong when you stumble across your path as long as you will not stop and will never go back or give up.  Just rise up and walk again.  Continue your pursuit for your dreams because the only person who can stop you is you. Life is not perfect and it is true but to make it perfect is when you have fallen many times and still rises up.  This is also how we learn to cherish the good times and appreciate it.

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